Love yourself

Zeeshan's Open diary

Childhood sexual abuse: Story of a survivor

Dr. Asif said, there are plenty of women who will keep their stories of sexual abuse to themselves till they die. No …

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Everyday Psychology
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All Articles
Everyday Psychology
Career
Relationships

A person reaching new heights symbolizing self actualization and personal growth

The path to Self-actualization: Your highest human need

For a person to be self-actualized there has to be a congruence between the real self (your present self with behavior, beliefs, etc.) and the ideal self (what you would want to become).

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Self Diagnostic Tools

Personality Distortion Assessment

When someone gets closer to someone who is close to me, I start feeling insecure

Yes No

I have a habit of overeating/overspending

Yes No

I have an ongoing feeling of being a victim of some sort of politics

True False

Sometimes I feel I am being followed/my social media accounts are being watched etc.

Yes No

I find it very difficult to trust people

Yes No

I start doubting my knowledge or skills when someone performs better than me

True False

I am emotionally detached to people even in close/intimate relationships

Yes No

I constantly monitor whether others are trying to betray me or not

Yes No

At times I am unable to deliver a project/task because I fear it is not perfect

True False

Sometimes I enjoy hurting myself

Yes No

I feel an excessive need for control over situations

Yes No

I change my career/Passion/relationships frequently

Yes No

I cannot read people's thought

True False

I have developed indifference for my own life goals

Yes No

I expect special treatments in social gatherings

True False

I avoid people as much as I can

Yes No

I find it difficult to understand humans through their gestures and facial expressions

Yes No

I am so obsessed with attention to details that it hampers the overall work timeline

True False

I feel good when I am the center of attraction in any public event and feel bad when I am not

True False

I exaggerate my emotions quite often

True False

Sometimes I enjoy threatening or torturing others

True False

I find it very difficult to express emotions

Yes No

I fear being abandoned

Yes No

I have never taken part in vandalizing school properties

True False

I have bullied/insulted someone for fun in last few months

True False

Either I love with great intensity or I hate with great intensity

Yes No

If I form a relationship, it is intense but becomes unstable

True False

I easily trust doctors/lawyers/CAs and other professionals

Yes No

I feel bad when others don't take care of me

True False

I always feel people will betray me

Yes No

Sometimes we should hurt people we love, because it determines the intensity of affection from their side

Yes No

I focus more on rules and regulations instead of getting things done

True False

I avoid conflicts and arguments because I fear people will leave me, or will stop supporting me

True False

Sometimes I can see things that others cannot see (Example- a flash of light, a shadow etc.)

Yes No

1 out of 7

Time’s up

Cognitive Distortion Assessment

My focus is mostly on

Negative events that happened with me

Positive events that happened with me

Whenever something mess up in life

I start expecting the worst case scenarios (note: “Expecting” not imagining)

I don’t expect worst case scenarios

I see things, people, events in polarized manner (Either entirely good or entirely bad)

Yes

When I make a sacrifice, I expect it to get rewarded or at least acknowledged

Yes

When something goes wrong between me and someone else

Either they are wrong or I am wrong

We both can be wrong

Being wrong is unacceptable, being right is above everything

I follow this in life

I don’t follow this in life

All things in life should be based on fairness and equality

Unfairness makes me overwhelm, depressed or angry

Life is unfair and I accept the unfairness

I start feeling responsible for people around me, things around me

Example: If teamwork is stuck and nobody knows why it is stuck, you start feeling responsible for it.

Yes, I start feeling a sense of guilt when I don’t do this

I understand my limitations

Overgeneralization is assuming a rule from one experience

Example:

1. All men are dogs because my boyfriend cheated on me.
If I failed for the first time in getting a client for my business, I am bad at marketing.

I think I do this

I don’t do this

I jump to conclusions based on little evidence

Example:

1. If one person has stolen my wallet, then I think everyone in his home is the same.
If I had a bad burger for the first time, then I start assuming burgers are terrible in taste.

This happens

This does not happens

I feel this must be true, therefore it must be true

This happens with me

No, this does not happens with me

I have the tendency of doing Extreme overgeneralization

Example:

If I failed in the job, I will also fail in business
If My boss was terrible, every other senior is terrible

Yes

I expect others to change according to my beliefs

Yes

I "should" or people "should" behave in a certain way

For example:

People should not stay in live-in relationships (But you have little to no concern about abusive marriages)
People should not drink alcohol (But you are okay with people eating junk food)
People should chase Entrepreneurship because 9-5 makes you a slave (But you are okay with maids working in your home)

Yes

Time’s up

Attachment Style Assessment

I find it relatively easy to get close to others.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I do not worry about being abandoned.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I find it difficult to allow myself to depend on others.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

In relationships, I often worry that my partner does not really love me.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I am comfortable depending on others.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I do not worry about someone getting too close to me.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I find that people are never there when you need them.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I am somewhat uncomfortable being close to others.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

In relationships, I often worry that my partner will not want to stay with me.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I want to merge completely with another person.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

My desire to merge sometimes scares people away.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I am comfortable having others depend on me.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I know that people will be there when I need them.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I am nervous when anyone gets too close.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I find it difficult to trust others completely.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

Often, partners want me to be closer than I feel comfortable being.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

I am not sure that I can always depend on others to be there when I need them.

Strongly disagree

Disagree

Neutral

Agree

Strongly Agree

Time’s up